Our hearts were racing with new challenges, our hearts were blazing, and we had no fear. That thrill, fire, and fearlessness that only being twenty can bring—without realizing how precious they are, we lived the last season of being twenty.
Yes, I’m forever stuck on giving a title for a new post. I didn’t want something so goddamn obvious like “My 2014 resolutions”, so I came up with one, which seems to be complete nonsense since it hasn’t been even 2 months since I hit the big 20. It hasn’t really hit me that I’m 20 years old already. Forget me having a late birthday, being 20 supposedly means a lot, but I hadn’t felt a thing yet. Got the idea from yet another K-drama, coincidentally enough, this time it’s Reply 1994! Not to digress too much, but there was this mention about being 20 (since the characters were of that age), so taadaa INSPIRATION! I haven’t finished the whole drama yet but there was this major aspect mentioned often regarding being 20, and that was regret. That doesn’t mean that I must do whatever I want now, since logically that’s not possible. I’m 20, I’m still young, there’s still a lot in store for me. It’s an age where I’m supposed to have a lot of dreams, and accomplishing them bit by bit. It’s where all the maybes becomes yes…
2013, I just can’t see to find a word to describe it. If I were to describe it, it was more of a period of recovery, as I shift back to a more relaxed mood rather than forever finding a need to make use of my time. Yes, I was much less productive but I felt much more free and life just went on like that for a year. If it wasn’t for the posts this year, 2013 would have been really just a blur picture to me. I wouldn’t say it was a waste of a year, yes time could have been spent much better, but given the circumstances *cough cough green* I would say it was a good year for me. Although it was an uneventful one (again… mostly due to army), I learnt a lot about others, a lot about the world and most importantly a lot about myself. I drifted away from some, reconciled with others and as the transition to adulthood approaches, so would the changes in my life come bit by bit. Not looking forward to most of them, but they would come and you would have to face the harsh cold reality of the world, sometimes even by yourself. No one would say this journey is easy, I’m expecting the worst already, but as the tough gets going, I hope that this post would serve as a backlog of things I want to accomplish for the year ahead. Even at times if I were to be mad and angry, I’ll vent it through “proper means”, and not on someone else (pinky swear!).
Why am I looking foward to 2014 a lot? First and foremost, I’m getting out of the army (aka O-R-D!). To be honest, given my life in army it really isn’t so bad. I have some sort of a passive income and for the “work” I do, the money I get is actually not very justifiable. But with that said, given how much I have ranted regarding it (may I present to you Exhibit A: The posts here in WordPress), I’ll settle with getting back my civilian life first. Army has been a good break from the books and a benefit to my lifestyle, as me pre-army did close to no exercise but now, I feel good, my body feels good. It has been too good of a break with the days passing, and I actually have nothing planned after I ORD. All of my friends seemed so busy after they ORD-ed and here I’m thinking, aren’y you supposed to be more free, not less free..? The obvious thing to do first is to get a job and save up some money, since when I’m back as as student, my income is back to zilch so saving some money would never hurt. But what about the other stuff that I wanted to do? I’m guessing that it would depend on how much I want to do those things (which I would cover in my short list of resolutions shortly towards the end). During this buffer period, overall I just want the time to be put into good use, a good balance of relaxation and doing stuff. Maybe as the days go by I would have a clearer goal in mind, but maybe I would plan it out as ORD comes nearer.
Secondly, I’m going to university. 4 years ago, if I was still the same, university would be nowhere within my reach. After 2 years of ‘hiatus’, I’m back to the student life, now yet again in a whole new environment. Being graded in class participation and having every single coursework being presentations feels really daunting, and I can see myself getting eaten alive by the competitive nature of the course. I wouldn’t dare say that I’m looking forward to uni, seeing and hearing all the complaints regarding handing up projects in time, studying for many different modules etc etc. As weird as this sounds, I actually miss studying. Somehow, I like to learn new things and if it interests me, studying it would be an enjoying process. It would have been great if there’s a course like studying the history of video games, but one can dream haha. After graduating and getting a degree (that’s assuming I make it LOL), I would be around my mid 20s, having a job and supporting myself, and this is the age where all these dreams suddenly get shut down as you get carried away by just surviving each day. If there’s something that you really want to fulfill, no matter how long it takes, how hard it might be, the heart will bring you to the correct direction. If there’s one thing that I want to remind myself for 2014, it is to be myself. I shouldn’t be changing for others, and why the hell should I? Of course, there will be this peer pressure to fit in with others. Don’t worry about all the little imperfections in life, no one is perfect and everyone, everyday still do make mistakes. The important thing is to learn from them and not commit the same mistake again.
Just a short and quick resolutions list for 2014, will do the explanations after listing them out:
– Keep moderately fit throughout the year
– Make an attempt to learn Korean if the chance arrives–
– Step out of my comfort zone, slowly but surely
– Be nice to others and never make any negative assumptions about others
– No matter how hard it might be, don’t give up as you only succeed when you have failed
So let’s go down the list! As the mugging mode resumes, I would also like to not just study all day and do a little exercise, be it sports, running or going to the gym. No need to go aim for timings for runs etc, just keep the body active and maintain priorities. If I have the time and money, I would probably go for Korean lessons again. If not, a little self-study won’t hurt. The last 3 are more to when I go to university, and as introverted as I may be, I would try my best to slowly step out of the bubble. As I meet new faces, there is always the tendency to assume that like hey, “That guy is an asshole, that girl is such a flirt, etc etc”, and I do that all the time. Well I shouldn’t right? 🙂 And when things just don’t seem to work your way, just stick to my principals and work hard, the things will fall back to place. Don’t be a bitch and whine, have some believe in yourself and the effort will show.
So this year’s edition of the year in review seems to be like everywhere, and there wasn’t much to talk about 2013 and more of me talking about 2014, which is weird since only a few days have past in this year. To sum it up, I went full freestyle LOL! Yays for more korean reference too (and end with one I shall!). Flying off in less than 24 hours, then it’s going to be a long 18 days in New Zealand. Will do a post regarding it, but till then.. Goodbye 2013, welcome 2014!
(ANOTHER BONUS: Yays to my music playlist being more diverse, another bubbly song which fitted the Christmas mood. Yeah it’s late but songs where you slowly bob your head to the tune… this is one of them for me haha ^_^)